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Are We Failing Our Kids?

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Behind every good kid is a mom who’s pretty sure she’s screwing it all up.

I saw the meme on a friend’s Facebook page, and my first thought was, “Man, if that’s true, then my kids are gonna turn out awesome, because I’m pretty sure I’m completely failing at this parenting thing.” What is it about raising kids that makes me so vulnerable, so self-conscious, so quick to believe I’m failing? I worry that I’m letting my kids have too much processed food, that I’m disciplining them wrong, that I let them have too much screen time, that I don’t assign enough chores, that I yell too much, that I don’t spend enough quality time with them, that I don’t…The list goes on and on. Well-meaning parenting books often make me feel guilty or cause minor panic that I’m already messing up my kids by doing things wrong. But ultimately, the test of whether or not I’m failing as a parent boils down to one question.

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This is the Year

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This is the year I stick to my diet.

This year I’m gonna get into an exercise routine.

This is the year I finally lose those extra pounds.

Most people start a new year off with high hopes and good resolutions, and many resolutions center around one’s health. Gyms do their best business around the end of December and beginning of January, because so many people join as motivation for a New Year’s resolution. This is all fine and good. There’s nothing wrong with committing to a healthier lifestyle. But what if we took our spiritual health as seriously as we take our physical health? What would those resolutions look like?

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One of my fondest Christmas memories is one that, at the time, seemed like a complete disaster. My mom was down with the flu and could hardly get out of bed, much less make the holiday meal she was planning to make. My dad, a pastor, had a funeral the morning of Christmas Eve, besides two evening services, and didn’t have time to make anything for us either. So after the funeral we ended up at Taco Bell for our Christmas Eve dinner, my dad wearing his clerical collar and my brothers and I in our play clothes.

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Extending Grace

When You Aren’t as Generous as You Think

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“Over half of the members in this congregation give less than the price of a Happy Meal every week.”

These words were spoken in a sermon about stewardship, and they’ve stuck with me ever since. Churches seem to be perpetually behind budget, nearly always in debt, and is it any wonder? If half of the members are giving $5 or less, how can we expect to sustain our congregations? Granted, this includes all those members “on the rolls” who don’t actually come, but let’s face it––tithing is not a common practice in our culture today. Sure, people can spend money on cable and Internet and cars and sports and lessons and… But church? Tithing is foreign to many people. So as I sat in church that Stewardship Sunday while the pastor discussed giving, I admit I felt a little swell of pride. Ah, I thought to myself smugly, but I DO tithe. I’m a faithful giver. But upon further reflection, I came to a startling revelation. I’m not nearly as generous as I’d like to think I am.

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Preparing for Harvey

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I was completely unprepared for Hurricane Harvey. Granted, we don’t live in the immediate danger zone, but being only a few hours from Houston, we knew we’d be getting heavy and persistent rains. The country roads in our area get washed out during heavy rain, and other roads flood, making them impassable. Kids basked in the novelty of having their first day of school canceled. Flash flood warnings popped up all over. Towns not too far from us had forced evacuations due to rivers flooding. In the face of such inclement weather, certain preparations are advised. Stock up on food in case you’re stranded for any length of time. Make sure you have plenty of potable water on hand should your water be contaminated by the fallout. Keep bags of ice handy in case the power goes out and you need to keep your refrigerated food from spoiling. All excellent advice. And I didn’t do any of it.

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Give Your Kids the Gift of Boredom

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At what age do kids learn to be bored? Is it something they develop on their own, or do we inadvertently teach it to them? I explore those questions in this article for Raising Godly Children, and although I didn’t plan it this way, it’s a great follow-up to my post from yesterday about going tech free.

The Tech Free Challenge

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Only in America would someone go for a week without technology and then blog about it. Last week my kids and I challenged each other to go the entire week without our phones, tablets, computers, and TVs. (Okay, I issued the challenge. They went along with it very grudgingly.) It was a perfect time to do this, since school isn’t in session and relatively few people need to get in contact with any of us. I did allow phone calls, but that was it. So what would we, a typical modern family, do without our screens for an entire week? I envisioned dramatic changes and unintended consequences, but to be honest, the whole thing was pretty anticlimactic. I guess you could say the experiment was a failure.

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Upcoming Events

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Okay, so it’s not exactly a book tour, but I do have a couple of events coming up in the next few months! More details for each are included in the “Events” menu tab at the top, but here are the quick highlights:

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Read Like a Lutheran

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The start of summer is widely associated with Memorial Day, so by those standards, summer is here! And what better way to celebrate summer than by entering a summer reading program? Concordia Publishing House is sponsoring a reading program for the entire family–adults and kids alike. The title is “Read Like a Lutheran,” and they have lists of books for each age group, and your name will be entered for a prize when you reach a certain number of points! I’m already signed up, as are my kids. If you have any number of CPH books around your house, you may already have enough to attain your goal. Arch books for the kids, for example, or (ahem) Our Faith From A to Z all count. As for adults, Grace Alone is on the list! Check your church library or swap books with a friend if you’re looking to expand your repertoire. What a great opportunity to curl up with some books! Happy reading!

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